Ask anyone and they’ll tell you: Breakups are the worst. The end of a marriage or significant relationship can be excruciatingly painful. Whether you initiated the split or not, a breakup can turn your entire world upside down and trigger all sorts of raw, terrifying and confused emotions.
As much as we’d like to avoid heartache altogether, breakups are an inevitable part of life, and there are lots of ways to help ease the pain and move on. It takes time, but it’s always possible to walk away from a breakup stronger and wiser. So take a deep breath, grab a journal to jot down some notes, and curl up in a comfy spot. We’ve gathered three great books from authors who can relate to what you’re going through, change your perspective and help you get back on your feet.
In The Breakup Bible, psychotherapist Rachel Sussman reveals the steps and secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track after a divorce or devastating breakup. Sussman draws from hundreds of counseling sessions and interviews conducted with women at various stages of growth and recovery. In her book, she introduces a three-phase process (healing, understanding and transformation) with perspectives and advice from real women at every stage. Sussman also introduces the exercise of creating a “Personal Love Map,” a blueprint to decipher where, when and how early life events influence and even predispose our relationship paths. This map makes it possible to break free of old, destructive patterns and move toward healthier relationships in the future. Not intended to be a quick fix, The Breakup Bible is an opportunity to get to know yourself better and build a stronger, smarter, healthier foundation for the rest of your life.
2. It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken: The Smart Girl’s Break-Up Buddy
By Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt
Ditch that box of tissues and be prepared to laugh out loud, get over your pity party and gain clarity with this more lighthearted breakup book written by He’s Just Not That Into You author Greg Behrendt and his wife Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt. The couple play the role of your witty, wise best friends as they share a helpful road map for getting past heartache with chapters chock full of practical, tell-it-like-it-is advice. You’ll overcome common breakup pitfalls through juicy horror stories, “psycho confessionals” and real tales of women who overreacted in the throes of breakup delusion. Their encouraging and lighthearted tone makes the book un-put-down-able. You’ll learn:
- Why you shouldn’t call your ex – and what he’ll think if you do.
- How to keep your friends and not lose your job.
- How to avoid “crazy” behavior like: IM-ing, stalking and having sex with your ex.
- How to reframe reality – seeing the relationship for what it really was.
Breaking up is no joke, but this manual will help you take it all a little less seriously.
3. Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow
By Elizabeth Lesser
During times of difficult transition, life offers us the choice to turn away from change or to embrace it. In the more than 25 years since Elizabeth Lesser co-founded the Omega Institute, the world’s largest center for personal growth, she has witnessed millions of different ways people weather change and transition. In a beautiful blend of moving stories, practical guidance and humorous insights, Lesser offers tools to help make the choice to be “broken open,” enlightened and transformed through life’s greatest trials. Lesser shares stories of ordinary people who have risen from the ashes of divorce, illness and loss of jobs or loved ones to emerge stronger, wiser and more in touch with their purpose and passion. She draws on the world’s great spiritual and psychological traditions to support the decision to dig deep and discover who we were meant to be when life challenges us most.