Conscious Uncoupling

And then they lived. . .

Happily even after.  We enter our romantic relationships with great love, hope, and excitement—we’ve found “the One,” so we plan and forge our happily-ever-afters together. But sometimes, for many different reasons, relationships come undone; they don’t work out. Commonly we view this as a personal failure rather than an opportunity. And instead of honoring what we once meant to each other, we hoard bitterness and anger, stewing in shame and resentment. That’s natural: we’re almost biologically primed to respond this way. Yet there is another path to the end of a relationship—one filled with mutual respect, kindness, and deep caring. In her groundbreaking book, Conscious Uncoupling: 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After, Thomas walks readers through the following five steps to get through a breakup and live happily after:


Step 1: Find Emotional Freedom: Readers learn to harness the energies of the dark and difficult emotions they may be experiencing, such as rage, hatred, fear, and despair, and transform them from destructive impulses to hurt themselves or others into constructive drivers of positive change.


Step 2: Reclaim Your Power and Your Life: Readers learn to let go of being a victim of love, and shift their perspective to begin taking personal responsibility for their part in what happened. By doing this, they begin to see how they have been a source of their own suffering in a way that frees them from repeating the dynamic again, and empowers them to evolve beyond disappointing patterns in love.


Step 3: Break the Pattern, Heal Your Heart: Readers identify their ”source-fracture story,” and start to understand how it’s been the underlying cause of their disappointing patterns in love. Readers will learn to acknowledge that their painful patterns in love have not simply been happening to them over and over again, and instead begin to distinguish exactly how these patterns have been happening through them, giving readers the power to evolve beyond them.


Step 4: Become a Love Alchemist: Readers begin to see themselves as capable of generating a positive future for themselves and everyone impacted by the breakup, no matter how hurtful or hard things have been until now. They will also be given the tools and techniques they’ll need to remove and repair any residue of hurt and festering feelings.


Step 5: Create Your Happily-Even-After Life: Readers are supported to make wise, healthy, and life-affirming decisions as they take on the essential tasks of reinventing their lives, and setting up vital new structures that will allow them and all involved to thrive after this transition.


By offering an alternative to antagonistic and hostile separations, Conscious Uncoupling makes a very difficult time in anyone’s life, a bit easier to bear. Thomas’s hope is that by using this program, both parties will come out of the process with respect for each other and themselves. Watch as the author shares how her personal experience with divorce inspired the method and the book behind the five steps to conscious uncoupling.


Conscious Uncoupling YouTube Screen Shot



Katherine Woodward Thomas, M.A., MFT, is the author of the national bestseller Calling in “The One”: 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life, a licensed psychotherapist, cocreator of the Calling in “The One” online courses, creator of the Conscious Uncoupling five-step process to recover from a breakup or divorce, and the cofounder of the Feminine Power Global Community, a thriving learning community serving thousands of women worldwide. For more information, please visit her website


Photo Credit: Conrado/Shutterstock

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