“Renewal” is the natural word that comes to mind when we think about spring—flowers are blooming again, the sun is shining
, and we’re busy refreshing our closets, revitalizing our vacation schedules and revamping our bodies. While you’re at it, why not renew one of the most important things in your life: your relationship.
If this sounds intriguing, Jaiya, a sexologist and author of Blow Each Other Away: A Couple’s Guide to Sensational Oral Sex, has an interesting recommendation: a 90-day oral sex challenge. Yes, that’s right, 90 days of oral sex!
Why? Because there’s no better way to renew the intimacy between you and your partner than committing to setting aside time for one another and improving your sexual connection, according to Jaiya. And, of course, you’ll have plenty of fun along the way! Here’s what Jaiya has to say about her experience with a challenge like this: “I noticed that by staying connected sexually with my partner every day, things only got better and better. We started touching each other more throughout the day, our connection felt better, we were more compassionate toward each other.” And, she adds, “We definitely got more adventurous as the days passed.”
If 90 days sounds too daunting, Jaiya suggests coming up with a number that you and your partner feel that you can commit to. Maybe it’s 30 or even just five days. Feel free to make up your own rules — give yourselves a set number of “free pass” days to use when life gets too busy to get busy, for example. Or “oral” could be defined as a passionate kissing session on some days. The point is that you connect with your partner consistently and push yourselves to explore your boundaries.
By consistently and lovingly giving each other oral pleasure, you’ll be forced to mix up your usual sexual routine and find ways to make your regular time together even more special. (If you run out of ideas, there are scores of them in Blow Each Other Away.)
If you need more convincing to commit, check out Jaiya’s blog about the challenge she and her partner completed recently. (You’ll see that even the partner of a sexologist needed a bit of convincing to take part! Listen in on their conversation about it before they started.) Jaiya’s positive experience with the challenge is inspiring—and not just because her partner lost 5 pounds in the process (don’t forget that oral sex can be a great cardio workout!). They also grew closer and learned about each other’s likes and dislikes.
Take a page from their book and get creative with your techniques during this time. Maybe for you this is as simple as giving your partner oral pleasure somewhere other than your bed! Or maybe it’s reserving a full hour on a Sunday to try out all the tricky positions you’ve always wondered if you could pull off.
Don’t forget to renew your sex life this spring—we promise you (and your lucky partner!) won’t regret it.
Live Twitter Chat With Jaiya: Have questions about the 90-day oral sex challenge? Get them answered during our live Twitter chat with Jaiya tonight, May 7, from 6-7 pm PST (9-10 pm EST). Use the hashtag #askjaiya to ask questions. Follow Jaiya on Twitter at @JaiyaNWSE.